


Angbang Fashion senses

by harnatano (orphan_account)



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: But I regret nothing, M/M, This Is STUPID, angbang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-28
Updated: 2015-03-02
Packaged: 2018-03-15 15:31:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3452363
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/harnatano
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A stupid argument between two dark lords about the colour of a robe.</p><p>(Forgive my mistakes in English)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Robe

"Have you lost your mind?" The Maia’s voice was stern, filled with a dark bitterness which would make any mortal or elvish soul shiver. "Or are these stupid sparkling jewels also burning your brain through that massive skull of yours?"  
"Come on Mairon, I’m sure it will suit you very well." The Dark Vala replied, a wicked smirk floating over his lips. "Moreover, these are totally your colours."  
"Those colours are ugly."  
"They are original, yes. But not ugly. And the lack of originality here is becoming ridiculous."  
”The lack of originality?!” Mairon exploded, a burning madness shining in his eyes. “Yesterday I was testing a new kind of torture including snakes and scorpions, and you dare talking about my lack of originality?!”  
"There’s nothing original in it… More or less a slight improvement of what we used to do with rats."  
"Rats are not venomous."  
The Vala didn’t reply, giving him an ironical glare instead.  
"Anyway, I am not wearing this." Mairon continued, crossing his arms over his chest in a sign of total rejection. "If the colours were more red-ish, then maybe, I would consider the idea… But this, what even is this?"  
"It is called magenta.”  
"You’ve just made it up."  
"And the little patterns on the sleeves are in yellow ochre.”  
"You are kidding me, right?"  
Melkor sighed deeply and looked lengthily at the robe, an expression of sheer disappoitment on his face.”I thought you would be happy. I ordered it myself. For you.”  
"I don’t know what they did to you in Valinor, but it must have been terrible to change you so much… Did they throw kittens at you?"  
"Do you know how many slaves we lost during the creation of this robe? Fifteen! All intoxicated by the dye!"  
"And you want me to wear it?"  
"It is harmless now. I think…"  
Rolling his eyes, the Maia turned, the sight of the ugly apparel making him physically sick ; It did hurt him deeply, and Mairon could amost feel his eyes bleeding for being exposed to it for so long. “Burn it, force an elf to weat it, make your own new banner with it, anything! But do not expect me to touch this grotesque robe!”  
“But you would look beautiful with it!”  
"I’d rather wear nothing." The Lieutenant spat, giving one last terrified look at the robe.  
"Deal?"  
Mairon froze, and narrowing his eyes, he stared silently at his master for a few long seconds. “Deal.”


	2. Without the Dress

At least, you could give me something to cover my-"  
"You said naked.” The dark Vala snapped. “And naked you will be.”  
The lieutenant was standing in font of his Master, his hands clumsily hiding what was supposed to be covered. He had carefully folded his tunic and breeches to avoid any kind of ugly creases, and was looking at Melkor with anxiety.

To be perfectly honest, Mairon began to regret his decision… The robe, magenta or not, was not so awful after all.  
"Mairon, there’s nothing I haven’t already seen…" The amused Vala chuckled, his hungry eyes running over Mairon’s naked body.  
"Maybe, but I still have a semblance of dignity. I am not going out like this."  
"A deal is a deal. 12 hours. It is not so long and you will get used to it. Look, I am already getting used to it, to the sight I mean."  
"Oh shut up!" the Maia spat. "This is so embarassing…. Why do I have to endure such a humiliation?"  
"Because I am your Master, and because it amuses me."  
Mairon didn’t reply, but the look he gave him was more than eloquent, and would have instantly break any other creature into pieces. Yet, at his lieutenant’s obvious rage, Melkor let out a loud laugh, picked up Mairon’s clothes and left the room.

——————————————-

"My lord? Why are you-"  
"Shut up or I’ll tear your eyes out of your ugly skull."  
The daily inspection of the troops appeared to be more unpleasant than usual as the naked Lieutenant walked through the rows. Trying hard to look as stoical as possible, and covering his sensitive parts with one hand, Mairon looked down at the reckless orc who had dared talking to him, and for a second, he wished he could rip off his skin and make a new robe with it.  
'If anyone makes a single remark..” He began, his voice echoing sternly in the large halls. “I will not hesitate. The wolves are always hungry and the Valaraukars need to pratice their whiping strikes. Am I clear?”  
A wave of affirmative grunts escaped from the crowd, and with a disdainful wince, Mairon continued his inspection.

——————————————-

'MAIRON!!'

At Melkor’s loud call the whole fortress seemed to tremble, but the lieutenant, wrapped in his pride, stepped before the throne. His still naked body shining gracefully in the dark room, he crossed his arms over his chest and waited for his Master’s commandement.  
'You got used to it finally.'  
'Apparently, yes. Can I have my clothes back now?”  
"No."  
Mairon jumped at Melkor’s cold statement. “But why? I did everything you asked! I even fed the wolves with nothing on me but a pair of dirty boots!”  
"What about these 157 orcs who were savagely executed today? I don’t remember giving this order."  
"I… I had to." The maia mumbled, frozen by Melkor’s harsh look. "I had to make an example of them."  
"An example for what, may I ask?"  
Nibbling at his bottom lip, the Maia looked away, apparently embarassed by what he was about to say. “…They looked at my ass.”  
A heavy silence fell on the two Ainur, eventually broken by Melkor’s mad laughters. Confused, Mairon frowned, waiting for his Master to calm down. But the Vala, absolutely not ready to stop, was still laughing maniacally, tears almost dripping from his eyes. After many long minutes, Mairon, who wasn’t amused at all by all this, finally exploded. “For Eru’s sake! Could you tell me what is so funny about it?!”  
Wipping his eyes, Melkor took a few more seconds to catch his breath and looked down at his lieutenant, a tender smile over his lips. “Mairon, Mairon… do you really think it was the first time they looked at it?”  
"What?"  
“Everyone is amazed by your gorgeous ass, everyone has always been amazed by it and everyone glances at it once a day, at least, naked or not.”  
The Maia turned pale, his eyes revealing nothing but disgust.  
"You cannot execute all the soldiers and servants of Angband just because they enjoy the beautiful shape of you fana.”  
Vehemently shaking his head, the Maia instinctively brought a hand between his legs and put the other on his butt to hide it as much as he could. As a reply, he simply bared his teeth, a reaction which only increased Melkor’s laugh crisis.  
Obviously offended and infuriated by the revelation, the lieutenant turned around and walked away, while Melkor calmed himself to glance one more time at his lieutenant’s glorious ass.  
"FUCK YOU MELKOR!"


End file.
